Kia ora,
A pickle some travel and adventure writers get into is writing all about themselves. It’s easy to do because that’s the natural angle to take when you’re writing about your trip.
Naturally, when you write about where you went, what you did, and how you got yourself out of different pickles, you write about yourself. And readers want to know about you. We’re curious; that’s one of the reasons we read adventure memoirs.
But too much focus on you, and specifically the word “I”, can slow your narrative and pull the focus away from the broader story and lessons that you’re sharing.
My article about reducing the number of “I”s in your writing lists six ways to get out of the “I” pickle:
1: Become an observer
2: Put the focus of the sentence first
3: Cut out filter phrases
4: Swap around the clauses
5: Tighten up unnecessary action
6: Tighten up moments of reflection and thoughts
Tips 1 and 3 are my favourite to edit. I get to ask you questions and give you ideas to help you dig deeper into the moment. Those are the details that really elevate a story and add emotional depth.
Keep writing, and keep adventuring.
Until next time,
Deborah
📚 What I’m reading
The Golden Spruce: A True Story of Myth, Madness and Greed, by John Vaillant
📅 Availability
Currently booking manuscripts from early June.
If you’re thinking of getting your manuscript edited, reply to this email. I can give you a free sample edit, and we can jump on a video call to chat about the editing process too.
✍️ Ways to work with me
Get your manuscript evaluation
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Deborah Shaw Adventure Editing 